Why Putting Yourself in Someone Else’s Shoes is Easier Said Than Done

True empathy—genuinely feeling what someone else feels—often requires shared experience. Most of us haven’t lived through every workplace event, whether it’s a promotion, a firing, performance challenges, or dealing with a difficult manager. If you haven’t been in the same situation, understanding someone else’s experience often requires a skill called perspective-taking.

What is Perspective-Taking?

Perspective-taking is the ability to view a situation from another person’s viewpoint. It’s about understanding why people behave a certain way in specific circumstances—without necessarily agreeing with or endorsing their actions.

Step 1: Embrace Curiosity

The first step in perspective-taking is recognizing that you don’t know the other person’s full story. This mindset shift cultivates curiosity and encourages you to solve the “puzzle” of their viewpoint. Embracing curiosity helps you overcome two common biases:

• ConfirmationBias: This bias leads us to focus only on information that supports our pre-existing beliefs. By admitting that you don’t know why someone is behaving a certain way, you’re more open to information that challenges your assumptions.

  
  

• FundamentalAttributionError: This bias causes us to attribute others' actions to their character rather than their circumstances. For instance, you might think someone is lazy or difficult without understanding the context. Acknowledging that people wear different “hats” depending on the situation helps you avoid labeling them based on a single behavior.

Step 2: Acknowledge Different Perspectives

The second step is recognizing that perspectives vary—and that they’re shaped by experiences, values, and biases unique to each individual. Our viewpoints are “hardwired” by childhood experiences, traumas, and personal values, making it challenging to accept other perspectives as equally valid. But this acknowledgment is key to true perspective-taking.

In the workplace, people’s perspectives often differ based on their roles and the information they have. For instance, a senior leader might view a situation differently because they have access to broader data. This shift helps combat #NaiveRealism—the assumption that we see the world objectively, while those who disagree with us are uninformed or irrational. In reality, even when two people witness the same event, they interpret it differently based on their perspectives.

Example: Rabbit or Duck?

Consider the famous optical illusions—the rabbit-duck or the old lady-young lady illusions. Why do you see one image over the other?

Such images illustrate how two people can look at the same thing and come away with completely different interpretations. This is a powerful reminder that perspective shapes perception.

Developing perspective-taking skills can help you understand and navigate complex workplace dynamics, especially when empathy isn’t possible due to lack of shared experiences. By embracing curiosity and acknowledging diverse perspectives, you’re better equipped to foster strong relationships and effectively manage differences in the workplace.

Perspective-taking might not be as emotionally resonant as empathy, but it’s a valuable skill that can help create more understanding, trust, and collaboration across teams.